Diari Abah-Berita Harian
2012/02/18
Bait akhir ‘isteriku sudah meninggal dunia’ penutup cerita terpahat sekian lama
TANGGAL 14.11,1996, isteriku meninggal dunia. “Itulah bait akhir ditulis oleh Abah. Sejak dari tarikh itu Abah tidak lagi membuka diari yang menjadi teman setia, apatah lagi untuk menulis peristiwa yang difikirkan penting dalam hidupnya.
“Diari itu memang bermakna bagi Abah. Setiap peristiwa membabitkan keluarga misalnya perkahwinan anak, kelahiran cucu semua dicatat, menggambarkan betapa berharga kasih sayang Abah terhadap isteri yang melahirkan zuriat dan keturunannya.
“Bagaimanapun, selepas tanggal 14.11.96, Abah tidak lagi berasa peristiwa selepas itu penting kerana dia tidak dapat lagi berkongsi dengan wanita disayanginya,” kata Teh yang ingin berkongsi detik hidup bersama lelaki cekal iaitu bapa kepada lapan anak.
Menurut Teh, selepas kematian emak, Abah menjadi pendiam, bercakap bila perlu saja. Sebagai anak, Teh tidak tahu apa yang terbuku dalam hati Abah.
“Ketika emak nazak, saya melihat Abah terpaku depan emak. Abah menyambut tangan emak dan memaafkannya. Selepas itu emak pergi untuk selama-lamanya dengan tenang.
“Walaupun kurang bercakap, Abah tidak lupa rutin hariannya sebagai siak masjid. Sebelum masuk waktu solat, Abah sudah kemas berpakaian dan menunggang basikal ke masjid. Walaupun masjid hanya 100 meter dari rumah, Abah tidak pernah lekang dengan basikal tuanya.
“Sebelah pagi ketika arwah emak masih ada, rutin Abah ke pasar juga mengayuh basikal. Semua peniaga tidak kira Melayu, India dan China yang Abah menjadi pelanggan tetap, tahu barang apa yang Abah beli dari gerai mereka.
“Saya biasa menemankan Abah ke pasar dan Abah akan menunjukkan kepada saya gerai mana yang sering dikunjunginya dan barang apa yang dibeli di situ.
“Selepas emak meninggal dunia, Abah masih teruskan rutin itu. Kami tak mahu menyekatnya walaupun tahu Abah makin tua dan berdepan bahaya jika terus berbasikal ke pasar yang laluannya semakin sibuk."
Menurut Teh pernah sekali, dia melarang Abah ke pasar dan mengambil alih tugas membeli barangan keperluan harian.
“Ketika kami sibuk membeli-belah di pasar, tiba-tiba kami ternampak kelibat Abah membeli-belah di gerai yang biasa dikunjunginya.
“Dia tetap juga mengayuh basikal ke pasar pada hari itu, walaupun tahu kami sudah mengambil tanggungjawabnya berbelanja,” katanya.
Kebimbangan kami mengenai keselamatan Abah ketika mengayuh basikal akhirnya diuji apabila suatu hari Abah tidak pulang ke rumah selepas solat Zuhur.
“Daripada cerita jemaah masjid, mereka memberitahu ada bersama Abah di satu majlis kenduri yang diadakan di kawasan berdekatan.
“Selepas Asar, Abah tak pulang sehinggalah menjelang Maghrib, kelibatnya juga tak kelihatan.
“Anak yang tinggal berdekatan sudah tidak menentu. Masing-masing membahagikan tugas menjejak abah.
“Anak yang tinggal di luar kawasan sudah diberitahu mengenai kehilangan Abah.
“Semalaman, kami tak tidur memikirkan ke mana Abah menghilang.
“Keesokannya ketika kami berkira-kira untuk membuat aduan mengenai kehilangan Abah, tiba-tiba Abah muncul depan rumah mengheret basikal tuanya.
“Abah masuk ke rumah dengan wajah tersenyum. Kain yang Abah pakai koyak-rabak, Abah masuk ke bilik dan baring di atas katil. Kami membiarkan Abah melepaskan penat.
“Selepas keadaan kembali tenang, barulah kami dapat tahu rupanya Abah tersesat ketika balik dari majlis kenduri.
“Kain pelikat yang Abah pakai koyak-rabak kerana Abah beberapa kali terjatuh dari basikal. Keadaan makin gelap dan nasib baik ada orang menemui Abah dan membawanya pulang ke rumah.
“Abah pula masih ingat alamat rumah dan berdasarkan alamat itu, orang itu menghantar Abah pulang keesokannya.
“Kami tidak tahu macam mana Abah boleh tersesat sedangkan tempat itu tidak jauh dari rumah.
“Untuk menghalang Abah menaiki basikal tua itu bukan penyelesaian yang paling baik.
Selepas berbincang, kami adik-beradik bersetuju meletakkan maklumat diri Abah dan alamat rumah kami pada kunci basikal Abah. Dengan cara ini, orang yang menemui Abah tentu tahu menghantar Abah pulang ke rumah jika tersesat lagi.
“Pengalaman Abah tersesat itu sudah jadi kenangan kerana pada 2006, Abah menyusuli ibu meninggalkan kami buat selama-selamanya.
“Abah meninggal ketika menunaikan solat Subuh di masjid. Pagi itu saya ingatkan Abah masih di rumah kerana selipar yang selalu dipakainya ke masjid masih ada di luar rumah. Memang menjadi kebiasaan Abah memakai selipar dalam rumah dan menggantikannya dengan selipar di luar apabila ke masjid.
“Hari itu Abah bawa sekali selipar dalam rumah ke masjid. Itu antara petanda dia akan pergi untuk selama-lamanya.
“Selain itu, jemaah yang bersolat Subuh bersama Abah melihat abah terhuyung-hayang ketika solat. Mereka melihat kain pelikat dipakai Abah terbuai-buai dihembus angin.
“Keadaan itu menghairankan jemaah di belakangnya kerana masjid itu berhawa dingin. Jemaah mengaku tidak khusyuk solat hari itu kerana bimbang dengan keadaan Abah yang tidak stabil.
“Abah jatuh terduduk pada kali pertama. Dia memicit kakinya dan kemudian bangun berdiri semula dalam safnya. Dia jatuh lagi kali kedua dan kali ini jemaah mengelilinginya yang sudah pengsan.
“Jemaah membawa Abah ke kereta dan menjemput saya untuk mengiringi Abah ke hospital. Tak sampai 100 meter dari rumah, seorang jemaah membisikkan bahawa Abah sudah tiada.
“Kami tak jadi ke hospital tetapi ke klinik swasta terdekat dan doktor mengesahkan Abah sudah tiada dan meminta dibawa pulang untuk urusan pengebumian.
“Abah meninggal pagi Jumaat dan dia disembahyangkan di masjid sebelum dikebumikan selepas solat Jumaat.
“Selepas Abah meninggal, saya ke pasar dan berbelanja di gerai yang Abah sering kunjungi. Peniaga bertanyakan Abah dan apabila diberitahu Abah meninggal dunia, mereka sedih dan kesal kerana tak diberitahu lebih awal,” kata Teh menutup bicara.
Apabila mendengar cerita Teh, Kak Ani memang tidak dapat menyeka air mata.
Banyak pengajaran diperoleh dari cerita Abah. Cinta dan kasih sayang pasangan dulu memang sejati. Walaupun jodoh diikat tanpa melalui proses perkenalan yang mesra seperti pasangan sekarang, mereka mampu melayari bahtera dengan tenang.
Pasangan Abah dan emak memang kaya tetapi bukan kaya wang ringgit. Anak dianugerahkan Tuhan dididik dengan penuh kasih sayang dan mereka berjaya dalam kerjaya masing-masing.
Diari itu masih tersimpan kemas dan itulah pusaka tidak ternilai ditinggalkan Abah. ..... - Benarlah kata orang....setiap perkara itu menjadi terindah bila ia dikongsi dengan orang yang dicintai....segagah mana pun seorang lelaki...dia tetap perlukan seorang wanita dalam hidupnya...wanita itu dicipta untuk lelaki bagi melengkapkan diri seorg lelaki...lihatlah sirah Nabi kita taktala menerima wahyu dari Allah...Baginda mengeletar menerima sesuatu yang sangat besar....tapi isteri Bagindalah yang menenangkan baginda...menyokong dan sangat mengasihi baginda.....Sesungguhnya....sebaik baik harta didunia ini ialah isteri solehah....
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Sunday, April 08, 2012
Satu janji yang pasti
"Di mana juga kamu berada, maut akan mendapatkan kamu(apabila sampai ajal) sekalipun kamu berada di dalam benteng-benteng yang tinggi lagi kukuh..."-Surah an Nisa,ayat 78. Kematian adalah sesuatu pasti....kematian merupakan syarat wajib untuk hidup didunia ini.....setiap dari kita pernah kehilangan orang tersayang dan kita pasti pernah melihat kematian orang lain.....kita semua akan menemui mati....aku terbayangkan andai aku yang dibalut rapi bersama kain kapan....hidung disumbat kapas....dan mata tertutup rapat....kemudian aku diusung ke kubur.....dimasukkan 7kaki kedalam tanah...kemudian dimasukkan ke liang lahat dan disendal tanah mengadap kiblat....kemudian dikambus seterusnya dipacak kayu sementara dan akhirnya di talkinkan........................disaat itu tiada apa yang dapat membantuku......tiada guna aku merintih,merayu dan menjerit........ya Allah.....aku takut azabmu.....aku takut nerakamu....ya Allah terimalah taubatku....rahmatkan aku dengan Kasih sayangMu......aku merayu padaMu......janganlah Kau paling dari melihatku dengan Kasih sayangMu......sesungguhnya aku hambamu yang lemah lagi hina.....padaMu aku berserah............
Saturday, April 07, 2012
Hanya pada Mu
"Tidak ada sesuatu kesusahan(atau bencana) yang ditimpakan dibumi dan tidak juga yang menimpa diri kamu, melainkan telah sedia ada di dalam Kitab(pengetahuan Kami) sebelum Kami menjadikannya"-surah Al-Hadid:22. Betapa indahnya Islam...mengajar kita untuk menjadi tabah dan cekal menghadapi apa saja kesusahan atau bencana yang menimpa....kita diajar untuk menjadi bersyukur dan redha dengan ketentuan Ilahi.... Kehidupan didunia ini hanya sementara....tiada apa yang kekal....yang kekal hanya diakhirat sana....disana matlamat kita.....disana kehidupan yang abadi..............dunia ini ibarat medan peperangan yang tiada kesudannya....dan kemenangan hanya ditentukan di akhirat nanti......... Sebagai manusia biasa,kita tak pernah dan mustahil apa yang terbaik buat kita.....kita yakin itu yang terbaik....sebenarnya itu yg akan musnahkan kita.....dan ada kita rasa itu yang terburuk tapi itu sebenarnya kunci kebahgiaan kita....hanya Allah yang tahu apa sebenarnya yang paling baik buat kita.......hapuskan air mata kekecewaan atau kesedihan.......alirkan air mata kesyukuran dan rayuan....HANYA PADA ALLAH....tiada yang selainya........ "Sesiapa yang dikehendaki oleh Allah menjadi baik maka ia akan diuji oleh-Nya"-hadis Nabi
Thursday, April 05, 2012
Ajarkan aku apa itu menghargai
Kadangkala... bila kita sendirian... kita selalu memikirkan saat terindah yang pernah kita lalui dulu..... kita tersenyum sendirian dan kadang kala terasa di awangan.... betapa nikmatnya.... andai masa itu dapat diputar kembali dan kita berpeluang untuk menikmati keindahan hidup itu berulang kali..... dan andai kesilapan dulu dapat diubah untuk tidak menjadi kesilapan..... tapi semua itu mustahil kerna air mata yang jatuh tak akan mengalir semula ke dalam mata.... tapi air mata yang jatuh akan terus mengalir kering di pipi... hanya kesannya berbekas di hati..... umpama air sungai yang mengalir.... akan terus ke laut sebelum diangkat kelangit menjadi wap air.... begitulah kehidupan ini.... kesilapan semalam menjadi pengajaran dan pedoman hari ini..... belajarlah untuk menghargai apa yang kita ada sekarang..... ungkapkan rasa cinta sekarang kepada orang tersayang sebelum kita lupa cara nak katakannya lagi.... belajarlah untuk menyayangi sebelum kita lupa apa itu sayang........ tetapi hakikatnya.... manusia tak pernah tahu apa yang dia ada sehinggalah dia kehilangannya........................
Tuesday, April 03, 2012
Penerang hati
Mencinta-Mu terangkan jiwaku
Merindu-Mu hatiku selalu
Hanya diri-Mu satu cintaku
Tak akan mampuku jauh dari-Mu
Satu nafasku harap Kau ada
Hanya pada-Mu Tuhanku rayu
Ku akan mencinta-Mu
Selalu merindu-Mu seluruh jiwaku
Kau terangi aku
Engkau penjaga hatiku
Pendamping jiwaku
Cerahkan cintaku
Cinta yang abadi
Jangan pernah kau menjauh
Merindu-Mu hatiku selalu
Hanya diri-Mu satu cintaku
Tak akan mampuku jauh dari-Mu
Satu nafasku harap Kau ada
Hanya pada-Mu Tuhanku rayu
Ku akan mencinta-Mu
Selalu merindu-Mu seluruh jiwaku
Kau terangi aku
Engkau penjaga hatiku
Pendamping jiwaku
Cerahkan cintaku
Cinta yang abadi
Jangan pernah kau menjauh
"papa hensem".... "papa busyuk"... "sayang papa"..... kata-kata indah yang bisa buat aku tersenyum..... menjadi azimat paling bermakna untuk aku melangkah menjalani hidup ini..... kalau dunia ini tidak memberikan kebahagiaan...... moga akhirat nanti terasa bahagianya.... tapi Tuhanku.... aku tak layak syurga-Mu..... namun aku takut neraka-Mu.... ampuni dah kasihilah aku Tuhan.... kepada-Mu sahaja tempat aku sujud dan mengadu...........
Kehilangan
"Kita tak akan tahu apa yang kita ada sehinggalah kita kehilangannya".... kehilangan mengajar kita untuk lebih menghargai apa yang kita miliki..... hidup ini penuh dengan ujian dan cabaran... sesungguhnya setiap yang berlaku adalah ketentuan dari Allah.... kita sebagai manusia biasa haruslah terima dengan redha setia ujian Allah.... semakin kita diuji maka hendaklah kita semakin dekat dengan Allah.... jadikan setiap ujian Allah itu untuk kita belajar dan muhasabah diri untuk menjadi lebih baik.... sesungguhnya setiap manusia itu lemah...tapi jadikan kelemahan. Itu kekuatan dengan menyerah diri sepenuhnya kepada Allah... Pada Dia kita sembah, merayu dan berserah....
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Kelajuan itu terlalu seksi
hhmmm..... kenapa aku pilih tajuk di atas untuk entri ni.. aku pun tak tahu... tapi aku tetap merasakan kelajuan itu terlalu seksi...w alaupun ada yang kata kelajuan itu membunuh.... tapi bagi aku tidak.... selagi kelajuan itu kena pada tempatnya, kena pada keadaannya... kelajuan itu bukan pembunuh... kita tetap akan terbunuh kerana banyak sebab... dan aku pasti... orang mati sakit jantung lebih banyak daripada mati kerana kemalangan (statistik ini telah ditolak mati kerana merempit dan memandu ketika mabuk... itu saja cari nahas)........
tak semua orang paham tentang kelajuan ni.... walaupun dah tidur sekatil sebantal... walaupun dah share selimut yang sama... tapi itu bukan jaminan untuk paham tentang rasa ini kalau tidak merasainya.... masih aku teringat wifey naik motor aku dulu nak pi bazar ramadan... nak terkoyak baju aku ditariknya kerana takut.. bukan laju pun.. aku bawa had laju sekolah saja kira-kira 40km/j.... tapi punyalah takut...
.....sekarang aku dah pakai motor super... lagilah susah dia nak ikut.... puas pujuk tapi hampa..... hehehe..
bagi aku kalau naik motor apa pun kenalah pakai pakaian, kasut dan alat keselamatan yang sempurna... tapi rabak jugalah poket aku nak beli barang tu...
kalau nak naik superbike ni.. kita kena disiplin sikit..tak boleh nak baik punya cilok lagi macam naik motor cub.... hehe...
vrommmm..... deruman sangat meresap dalam jiwa.. sungguh asyik dan seksi...hahah
nak beli motor baru lagi.... wifey jangan marah yerrrr....
tak semua orang paham tentang kelajuan ni.... walaupun dah tidur sekatil sebantal... walaupun dah share selimut yang sama... tapi itu bukan jaminan untuk paham tentang rasa ini kalau tidak merasainya.... masih aku teringat wifey naik motor aku dulu nak pi bazar ramadan... nak terkoyak baju aku ditariknya kerana takut.. bukan laju pun.. aku bawa had laju sekolah saja kira-kira 40km/j.... tapi punyalah takut...
.....sekarang aku dah pakai motor super... lagilah susah dia nak ikut.... puas pujuk tapi hampa..... hehehe..
bagi aku kalau naik motor apa pun kenalah pakai pakaian, kasut dan alat keselamatan yang sempurna... tapi rabak jugalah poket aku nak beli barang tu...
kalau nak naik superbike ni.. kita kena disiplin sikit..tak boleh nak baik punya cilok lagi macam naik motor cub.... hehe...
vrommmm..... deruman sangat meresap dalam jiwa.. sungguh asyik dan seksi...hahah
nak beli motor baru lagi.... wifey jangan marah yerrrr....
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Bermulanya sebuah pengakhiran
Sesuatu pengakhiran itu adalah sebuah permulaan.... dan sebuah permulaan itu adalah satu pengakhiran....... hmmm.. terdetik hati tertanya sendiri.... seperti mana berakhirnya tahun 2010 dan bermulanya tahun 2011... seperti mana berakhirnya kehidupan aku sebagai seorang suami mingguan kepada suami harian....dan seperti mana berakhirnya kehidupan aku di kuarters hospital sultan abdul halim untuk bermula semula kehidupan sementara di rawang sebelum menetap semula di tempat aku menimba ilmu dulu untuk menjadi seperti saat ini.... SHAH ALAM... AKU KEMBALIIIII !!!!!!!!
Shah Alam... sebuah bandar raya yang mendamaikan.... sebuah bandar raya indah mempesona..sebuah bandaraya yang sarat dengan kenangan dan pengorbanan aku dari seorang mahasiswa.. lelaki bujang.. suami orang dan sekarang bapak orang... huhu... begitu pantas masa berlalu...setahun terasa sehari.... sehari terasa sedetik....
Bila mana wifey tercintaku mengenakan syarat tempat pemilihan kawasan kediaman kami... iaitu rumah kami mestilah kawasan yang majoritinya penduduk islam melayu... kawasan yang rumah yang berpijak di atas tanah... dan kawasan yang membantu tumbesaran pemikiran anak kami... maka Shah Alamlah yang terlintas.. dan alhamdulillah moga rumah baru kami ini menjadi saksi kebahagiaanku bersama isteri serta permata hati ku......
Hmmm... pertama hatiku Imaan Khadeja Aisha... sudah setahun sebulan umurnya sekarang.... dia memang mendamaikan... menenangkan serta menghiburkan.... walaupun kadangkala aku terpaksa bersengkang mata tengah malam buta hanya untuk meneman dia bermain dan membaca gambar... hehehe... aku rela walaupun terpaksa... semua kerna mu Imaan... hehehe...
Semoga tahun 2011 menjadikan aku lebih cemerlang sebagai hubby kepada wifeyku serta papa yang cool untuk permata hatiku itu.... aku mendoakannya.... papa love mummy dan imaan.... muahhhsss
Shah Alam... sebuah bandar raya yang mendamaikan.... sebuah bandar raya indah mempesona..sebuah bandaraya yang sarat dengan kenangan dan pengorbanan aku dari seorang mahasiswa.. lelaki bujang.. suami orang dan sekarang bapak orang... huhu... begitu pantas masa berlalu...setahun terasa sehari.... sehari terasa sedetik....
Bila mana wifey tercintaku mengenakan syarat tempat pemilihan kawasan kediaman kami... iaitu rumah kami mestilah kawasan yang majoritinya penduduk islam melayu... kawasan yang rumah yang berpijak di atas tanah... dan kawasan yang membantu tumbesaran pemikiran anak kami... maka Shah Alamlah yang terlintas.. dan alhamdulillah moga rumah baru kami ini menjadi saksi kebahagiaanku bersama isteri serta permata hati ku......
Hmmm... pertama hatiku Imaan Khadeja Aisha... sudah setahun sebulan umurnya sekarang.... dia memang mendamaikan... menenangkan serta menghiburkan.... walaupun kadangkala aku terpaksa bersengkang mata tengah malam buta hanya untuk meneman dia bermain dan membaca gambar... hehehe... aku rela walaupun terpaksa... semua kerna mu Imaan... hehehe...
Semoga tahun 2011 menjadikan aku lebih cemerlang sebagai hubby kepada wifeyku serta papa yang cool untuk permata hatiku itu.... aku mendoakannya.... papa love mummy dan imaan.... muahhhsss
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
I.K.A at 1 month (plus 1 day actually)
Imaan Khadeja Aisha was 1 month old yesterday..she had her Hep B jab and 1 month check up at KK Batu Arang (sungguh pekan koboi tempat itu)..was cranky and extra clingy whole day hence the entry can only be written today..mummy tau sayang sakit..kesyiannn princess mummy
At 1 month,she can...
-smile to herself and to mummy,papa,tuk mama and wan de when we r talking to her and of course in her sleep
-vocalise..kadang2 dengar eyap,gege,okhe,hmmm..mummy thinks u r so adorable
-finally can sleep longer at night..dah 4 hari tido lame..if not means mummy has to rock her in her arms,sang her lullabye and zikir and citer rapunzel,snow white,kisah chenta mummy and papa etc etc from 12 to 6 am..no break mummy..WE HAVE TO ONCALL!!
-fully breastfeed alhamdullilah...susu mummy finally enuff to make her full in the third week of life..no more waking papa up to bancuh susu or warm pumped breastmilk in the wee hour in the morning..tendang itu frisolac gold ke tepi debushhhhh!! mmg sakit hati mummy terpaksa kasi susu lembu kat princess mummy ni
-recognise papa,mummy,tuk mama and wan de
-open her eyes wide and move her head around looking at everything around her as if trying to absorb all the info and learning..and can follow mummy's movement even when im at the corner of the room
-express herself..when she can still wait before being picked up..she will give warning oh and ah,then a short shout,then only a good loud cry.if she doesnt like something..she'll cry out so loud instantly
-negotiate..when she's crying refusing to be put down..mummy can try to negotiate telling her eg kite cuci poo poo dulu ye..nanti mummy pick up.she can actually stays put until after we finished changing her diaper..provided we are quick hehe
she looks a lot like papa
her nose is like papa's
her hairline sejibik cam papa
her ears are miniature version of papa's
she's tall like papa..at 1 month..she's 57cm tall
she's chubby like both papa and mummy hehe..at 1 month..she's 4.44 kg
she's red..yup not pink red..merah padam cam papa..when she cries she looks like udang kene bakar
she sleeps with papa's style..sgt same but mummy just too sleepy at night to take their picture together
her eyelashes are like papa's
her eyes however..are her owns..tak same ngan sesape pon
i must be sad u think that she's papa's lil girl
NOPE
while the exterior are all papa's
her interior is definitely a copy of IKA Sr hehe
so..she's still mummy's lil girl too
hmm need to cont the last entry...my khadeja is crying next door..better go get her first..toodles
At 1 month,she can...
-smile to herself and to mummy,papa,tuk mama and wan de when we r talking to her and of course in her sleep
-vocalise..kadang2 dengar eyap,gege,okhe,hmmm..mummy thinks u r so adorable
-finally can sleep longer at night..dah 4 hari tido lame..if not means mummy has to rock her in her arms,sang her lullabye and zikir and citer rapunzel,snow white,kisah chenta mummy and papa etc etc from 12 to 6 am..no break mummy..WE HAVE TO ONCALL!!
-fully breastfeed alhamdullilah...susu mummy finally enuff to make her full in the third week of life..no more waking papa up to bancuh susu or warm pumped breastmilk in the wee hour in the morning..tendang itu frisolac gold ke tepi debushhhhh!! mmg sakit hati mummy terpaksa kasi susu lembu kat princess mummy ni
-recognise papa,mummy,tuk mama and wan de
-open her eyes wide and move her head around looking at everything around her as if trying to absorb all the info and learning..and can follow mummy's movement even when im at the corner of the room
-express herself..when she can still wait before being picked up..she will give warning oh and ah,then a short shout,then only a good loud cry.if she doesnt like something..she'll cry out so loud instantly
-negotiate..when she's crying refusing to be put down..mummy can try to negotiate telling her eg kite cuci poo poo dulu ye..nanti mummy pick up.she can actually stays put until after we finished changing her diaper..provided we are quick hehe
she looks a lot like papa
her nose is like papa's
her hairline sejibik cam papa
her ears are miniature version of papa's
she's tall like papa..at 1 month..she's 57cm tall
she's chubby like both papa and mummy hehe..at 1 month..she's 4.44 kg
she's red..yup not pink red..merah padam cam papa..when she cries she looks like udang kene bakar
she sleeps with papa's style..sgt same but mummy just too sleepy at night to take their picture together
her eyelashes are like papa's
her eyes however..are her owns..tak same ngan sesape pon
i must be sad u think that she's papa's lil girl
NOPE
while the exterior are all papa's
her interior is definitely a copy of IKA Sr hehe
so..she's still mummy's lil girl too
hmm need to cont the last entry...my khadeja is crying next door..better go get her first..toodles
Thursday, February 25, 2010
itching..finally
hai peeps...finally got a chance to jot down sth..i've been itching to do this for long..after the arrival of our bundle of joy * IMAAN KHADEJA AISHA * 25 days ago i mean
THE BIRTH STORY
28 JAN 2010 2300 HR- no signs of labour even tell tale that im going into labour yet..mulut dah muncung..hati dah gundah..hmm post date lah anakku ini.tapi....
mak aiiiii panasnye badan..mmg shirtless.and hubby has to tepid sponge my body as i was like cacing kepanasan.then zzzzzzz....
29 JAN 2010 0330 HR
Bladder said " i wanna pee,i wanna pee"..i felt sth like coming out down there already..ying ying..did i wee wee or my water broke?nahhhh then off i go wee wee for real.the minute i lied back on the bed..hot water just came out and wet my whole sarong...with a smile on my face..i woke an extremely mamai hubby who jumped ready to go mandi to go to work thinking its already 6..told him calmly "im going into labour"..and calmly instructed him what to do.but being calm didnt help hubby apparently hehe..he still panicked deep down inside i knew
hubby was really confused how i was so comfortable packing my things and went to the kitchen to get sth to eat.we woke my parents up after 2 hours telling that my water broke at 3.i told hubby i didnt have the slightest pain..hence the manner.after subuh we headed straight to UMRA at shah alam
0700 HR
checked by Dr K..u r 1 cm now.we'll send u to the ward.up we went and antibiotics+enema was given to me. i thought they'll leave me alone till i'm 3 cm then only they'll send me to the labour room.like what we usually practise at Sg Petani.But a few mins later Dr K came and told me Dr U asked me to be sent to labour room and they would start pitocin (an agent to kick start my contraction) straight away.puzzled but since im under their care..eden ikut jo lah
0730 HR
in labour room...pitocin started..CTG wrapped around my belly..baby's heartbeat always atad bit on the low side
Dr K "do u want pethidine (analgesia)?"..me "thats fine,im still having zero pain"
the minute she left..my contraction began..and hence the pain
it gets stronger and stronger and more regular..i think once every 4 mins..i was praying that i will open fast..Dr K said my cervix was quite promising that it wont take long
1030 HR
Dr U showed up.I was examined.2 cm..hmm some progress.she asked how I was..with a kelat smile i said "great".hubby kat sebelah dah tersengguk-sengguk ngantuk.dah le kene marah sbb letak air kat muka saye tetibe.by that time the pain was excruciating and i started whimpering..was really considering asking for pethidine..really sleepy but couldnt possibly sleep due to the pain
1230 HR
i asked the nurse for pethidine..she went out to get the Dr.Dr U came..do u want epidural?yes please,now no more smiling..just ohw and ahh and both my hips were killing me in addition to my contraction.i couldnt put my leg down..sgt sakit hips jugak.hubby nye muke dah pucat i pity him but cant say anything to make him feel better.Dr U said the anaesthesiologist,Dr A was in the OT attending 1 caesar,so she'll be there in half and hour
1315 HR
Dr A finally arrived,i lied there thinking of Allah not knowing what else to do as the pain was a minute apart.i was hoping the epidural will help.everybody says there will be no pain at all until u deliver pon tatau bile nak push.so they sat me up,hugging hubby to get into the right position.the minute she put the needle on my back..i felt a severe shooting pain down my left leg..i screamed.she calmed me down then the leg pain subsided.ape la yg jadi sebenanye.pastu..rase contraction pain kurg sket..baru rase cam bertenang.but i still felt the pain.still couldnt sleep.hubby left for Friday prayer..mama came in to teman me.
1500 HR
contraction pain getting stronger despite the epidural..i was whimpering again.the nurse asked how i was doing.i just said the epidural was not working anymore.i couldnt stay still.i couldnt move so much either due to my hips pain.she went off to get the Dr again.and the pain continued
1630
Dr U came in.By now,there was no gap between the contraction.Pain was continuous i felt so tired and spent.She gave me a bolus of epidural cocktail.VE done-3 cm.she looked at me and hubby-"maybe u need..and i sambung "caesarean?".she nodded."u've been in labour for 13 hours now..we'll see another 2 hours.if u tak bukak..then caesar..i nodded weakly.frustrated nye hati Allah aje yg tau..air mate pon tup tup jatuh atas pillow.dlm hati screaming "I DONT WANT!!!I DONT WANT!!!" hubby kate..it's ok asalkan sayang n baby selamat..i kept on crying.since the contraction was so intense i thought i will eventually dilate
1815 HR
the past hours i tried to find peace in letting myself having a caesar and dealing with the pain.i know next time im going into labour i shouldnt ask for epidural coz it simply didnt work for me.sakit mmg tak tahan cam nak kuar air mata darah je.Dr U
came and did VE again-still 3 cm.Final-we are going for caesar.They put me in a gown.i walked to the OT which is just next door with difficulty.By then i was praying that Dr A will come soo as i couldnt bear the pain anymore.I heard them talking.i told them i need to wee wee.i was really groggy.
The next thing i know i was in a dream-like state.I felt like there were people operating on me but my eyes were blurred.i thought i could feel the diathermy slashing my tummy and i screamed in my throat "pain,pain".then...i couldnt remember anything
to be continued....
THE BIRTH STORY
28 JAN 2010 2300 HR- no signs of labour even tell tale that im going into labour yet..mulut dah muncung..hati dah gundah..hmm post date lah anakku ini.tapi....
mak aiiiii panasnye badan..mmg shirtless.and hubby has to tepid sponge my body as i was like cacing kepanasan.then zzzzzzz....
29 JAN 2010 0330 HR
Bladder said " i wanna pee,i wanna pee"..i felt sth like coming out down there already..ying ying..did i wee wee or my water broke?nahhhh then off i go wee wee for real.the minute i lied back on the bed..hot water just came out and wet my whole sarong...with a smile on my face..i woke an extremely mamai hubby who jumped ready to go mandi to go to work thinking its already 6..told him calmly "im going into labour"..and calmly instructed him what to do.but being calm didnt help hubby apparently hehe..he still panicked deep down inside i knew
hubby was really confused how i was so comfortable packing my things and went to the kitchen to get sth to eat.we woke my parents up after 2 hours telling that my water broke at 3.i told hubby i didnt have the slightest pain..hence the manner.after subuh we headed straight to UMRA at shah alam
0700 HR
checked by Dr K..u r 1 cm now.we'll send u to the ward.up we went and antibiotics+enema was given to me. i thought they'll leave me alone till i'm 3 cm then only they'll send me to the labour room.like what we usually practise at Sg Petani.But a few mins later Dr K came and told me Dr U asked me to be sent to labour room and they would start pitocin (an agent to kick start my contraction) straight away.puzzled but since im under their care..eden ikut jo lah
0730 HR
in labour room...pitocin started..CTG wrapped around my belly..baby's heartbeat always atad bit on the low side
Dr K "do u want pethidine (analgesia)?"..me "thats fine,im still having zero pain"
the minute she left..my contraction began..and hence the pain
it gets stronger and stronger and more regular..i think once every 4 mins..i was praying that i will open fast..Dr K said my cervix was quite promising that it wont take long
1030 HR
Dr U showed up.I was examined.2 cm..hmm some progress.she asked how I was..with a kelat smile i said "great".hubby kat sebelah dah tersengguk-sengguk ngantuk.dah le kene marah sbb letak air kat muka saye tetibe.by that time the pain was excruciating and i started whimpering..was really considering asking for pethidine..really sleepy but couldnt possibly sleep due to the pain
1230 HR
i asked the nurse for pethidine..she went out to get the Dr.Dr U came..do u want epidural?yes please,now no more smiling..just ohw and ahh and both my hips were killing me in addition to my contraction.i couldnt put my leg down..sgt sakit hips jugak.hubby nye muke dah pucat i pity him but cant say anything to make him feel better.Dr U said the anaesthesiologist,Dr A was in the OT attending 1 caesar,so she'll be there in half and hour
1315 HR
Dr A finally arrived,i lied there thinking of Allah not knowing what else to do as the pain was a minute apart.i was hoping the epidural will help.everybody says there will be no pain at all until u deliver pon tatau bile nak push.so they sat me up,hugging hubby to get into the right position.the minute she put the needle on my back..i felt a severe shooting pain down my left leg..i screamed.she calmed me down then the leg pain subsided.ape la yg jadi sebenanye.pastu..rase contraction pain kurg sket..baru rase cam bertenang.but i still felt the pain.still couldnt sleep.hubby left for Friday prayer..mama came in to teman me.
1500 HR
contraction pain getting stronger despite the epidural..i was whimpering again.the nurse asked how i was doing.i just said the epidural was not working anymore.i couldnt stay still.i couldnt move so much either due to my hips pain.she went off to get the Dr again.and the pain continued
1630
Dr U came in.By now,there was no gap between the contraction.Pain was continuous i felt so tired and spent.She gave me a bolus of epidural cocktail.VE done-3 cm.she looked at me and hubby-"maybe u need..and i sambung "caesarean?".she nodded."u've been in labour for 13 hours now..we'll see another 2 hours.if u tak bukak..then caesar..i nodded weakly.frustrated nye hati Allah aje yg tau..air mate pon tup tup jatuh atas pillow.dlm hati screaming "I DONT WANT!!!I DONT WANT!!!" hubby kate..it's ok asalkan sayang n baby selamat..i kept on crying.since the contraction was so intense i thought i will eventually dilate
1815 HR
the past hours i tried to find peace in letting myself having a caesar and dealing with the pain.i know next time im going into labour i shouldnt ask for epidural coz it simply didnt work for me.sakit mmg tak tahan cam nak kuar air mata darah je.Dr U
came and did VE again-still 3 cm.Final-we are going for caesar.They put me in a gown.i walked to the OT which is just next door with difficulty.By then i was praying that Dr A will come soo as i couldnt bear the pain anymore.I heard them talking.i told them i need to wee wee.i was really groggy.
The next thing i know i was in a dream-like state.I felt like there were people operating on me but my eyes were blurred.i thought i could feel the diathermy slashing my tummy and i screamed in my throat "pain,pain".then...i couldnt remember anything
to be continued....
Sunday, January 24, 2010
the birth story
i read my friend's birth story today..kecut perutku..dr nak cepat2 deliver jadi takut plak..the pain is unimaginable.i used to be the person on the other end during labour.. meaning the one who's waiting for the baby to pop out with words of encouragement chewah..but to be the star of the show..mak aii..eden feels like chickening out but u cant possibly do so can u..so kene la menghadapinye..
banyak2 doa ajelah
been getting a lot of texts asking bout the baby..tp sumenye hampa coz baby is still playing inside
been harrased by org2 pejabat di hospital..mase kite cuti ni lah nak suruh settle sume bende..dah tuh kite cakap kite dah nak beranak nih..tak kire doctor kene settle jugak..buat berasap telinga eden je..tak considerate langsung..sape2 ade sedara rase nak keje kat sepital sungai petani tuh..pilih je la sepital lain..safe urself the madness
hmm emo2 nih tak baik tuk kesihatan..baik pg makan ice cream..chiow
banyak2 doa ajelah
been getting a lot of texts asking bout the baby..tp sumenye hampa coz baby is still playing inside
been harrased by org2 pejabat di hospital..mase kite cuti ni lah nak suruh settle sume bende..dah tuh kite cakap kite dah nak beranak nih..tak kire doctor kene settle jugak..buat berasap telinga eden je..tak considerate langsung..sape2 ade sedara rase nak keje kat sepital sungai petani tuh..pilih je la sepital lain..safe urself the madness
hmm emo2 nih tak baik tuk kesihatan..baik pg makan ice cream..chiow
Friday, January 22, 2010
my past few weeks
haluuuuuu
im in rawang right now..under the safe care of mama n ayah and of course hubby dearest..yeah.. a lucky turn of fate i supposed
my past few weeks was chaotic to the core though i thought i was keeping my sanity quite well
i was under so much stress which was not obvious to me but when mama came to teman me in SP as i was already entering my 9th month of pregnancy..she stressed out how terrible i was that she was worried sick looking at me
3 weeks ago we had a bombshell..my bestfriend's husband passed away suddenly until he had to undergo a postmortem to ascertain the cause of death..we went to A level college together so i knew him in person..i just couldnt bear to imagine how she was keeping up with the sorrow..but she's a strong lady.ayat die cakap ngan saye..takpe,ade orang lebih baik pergi awal kalau die mmg dah sedia.i could only talk to her on the phone as i was still doing calls then.they have a lovely lil boy,just reaching 2 years of age.what we can do is just to be there for her when she needs us..and so far i think she's doing great.i am so proud of her.i guess if u have a kid,the baby will be the best penguat semangat and the strongest reason for us to continue living
coming to term..my body was not keeping up with my spirit.i was still full of semangat going to work..colleagues said no more calls after 36 weeks so that was grant.but i still operate,went to clinic and wards.moving around non stop.all in the good faith that it will make my delivery fast and easier.thats when my legs started to balloon up until they look like a pair of kaki gajah.then the left one became smaller but my right leg just refused to shrink.i let them be for 2 weeks..thinking its normal in pregnancy.then pain started to kick in..i was thinking along a dangerous diagnosis..do I have DVT (Deep venous thrombosis = a disease where u have blood clots in ur vessels that can dislodge and clot the vessels in your lung/heart ie DEATH).its very unlikely given the fact i was very2 active
so blood test was done-ABNORMAL.my gynae friend told me to see her again the next day.i called boss..despite his ramble that 'it is nothing,just caused by your pregnancy,its something to do with ur umbilical cord,urgh my patho book is in KL..but i still think it's not DVT.u r walking etc etc..'..there were notes of concern in his voice..so i was like praying hard and tried not to panic coz mama is at home and hubby was in KL and i must not make them panic
next morning while in the OT operating.. i received a call from gynae friend-Intan u kene masuk ward laa...mati la I tak suruh u masuk ward smalam.so i was like..ok kejap lagi dah abis op ni i'll come and c u..bos and all collegues were there making jokes so i left the OT dgn bergayanye to masuk ward.takdelah boss panggil saye pemalas saje tanak keje bile dah term kan hehe
then i had a scan of both legs..not really normal but not dangerous either.was referred to medical team..luckily specialist yg tgk was my neighbour sebelah rumah hehe.dok dalam ward 1 night bosannnnnyerrrrr.dah la eventful coz the lady beside me just delivered and jatuh 2 kali dlm ward so asyik terdengar jeritan..doctor,tolong!!!..tula dah namenye keje dr nih masuk ward pon kene treat patient..in conclusion..i dapat MC 2 weeks which is really near to my due date..so i mencutikan diri terus sampai deliver nyeh nyeh
like magic my swollen legs shrink after i came back from ward..last week i felt like i was already going into labour so we hastily packed everything and came back to KL.
today is my 39th week.and munchkin showed no signs of coming out yet.it seems like she's getting more and more comfortable in there.i dont wanna go post date..but everybody else sibuk nak samekan birthday die ngan diorg..waduh2 mummy tak larat nak tunggu dah..now rase mcm over rested plak.papepon i just pray that everything will go smoothly and both me and baby selamat.
maybe next time the blog will have photos.menarik sket kan..
im in rawang right now..under the safe care of mama n ayah and of course hubby dearest..yeah.. a lucky turn of fate i supposed
my past few weeks was chaotic to the core though i thought i was keeping my sanity quite well
i was under so much stress which was not obvious to me but when mama came to teman me in SP as i was already entering my 9th month of pregnancy..she stressed out how terrible i was that she was worried sick looking at me
3 weeks ago we had a bombshell..my bestfriend's husband passed away suddenly until he had to undergo a postmortem to ascertain the cause of death..we went to A level college together so i knew him in person..i just couldnt bear to imagine how she was keeping up with the sorrow..but she's a strong lady.ayat die cakap ngan saye..takpe,ade orang lebih baik pergi awal kalau die mmg dah sedia.i could only talk to her on the phone as i was still doing calls then.they have a lovely lil boy,just reaching 2 years of age.what we can do is just to be there for her when she needs us..and so far i think she's doing great.i am so proud of her.i guess if u have a kid,the baby will be the best penguat semangat and the strongest reason for us to continue living
coming to term..my body was not keeping up with my spirit.i was still full of semangat going to work..colleagues said no more calls after 36 weeks so that was grant.but i still operate,went to clinic and wards.moving around non stop.all in the good faith that it will make my delivery fast and easier.thats when my legs started to balloon up until they look like a pair of kaki gajah.then the left one became smaller but my right leg just refused to shrink.i let them be for 2 weeks..thinking its normal in pregnancy.then pain started to kick in..i was thinking along a dangerous diagnosis..do I have DVT (Deep venous thrombosis = a disease where u have blood clots in ur vessels that can dislodge and clot the vessels in your lung/heart ie DEATH).its very unlikely given the fact i was very2 active
so blood test was done-ABNORMAL.my gynae friend told me to see her again the next day.i called boss..despite his ramble that 'it is nothing,just caused by your pregnancy,its something to do with ur umbilical cord,urgh my patho book is in KL..but i still think it's not DVT.u r walking etc etc..'..there were notes of concern in his voice..so i was like praying hard and tried not to panic coz mama is at home and hubby was in KL and i must not make them panic
next morning while in the OT operating.. i received a call from gynae friend-Intan u kene masuk ward laa...mati la I tak suruh u masuk ward smalam.so i was like..ok kejap lagi dah abis op ni i'll come and c u..bos and all collegues were there making jokes so i left the OT dgn bergayanye to masuk ward.takdelah boss panggil saye pemalas saje tanak keje bile dah term kan hehe
then i had a scan of both legs..not really normal but not dangerous either.was referred to medical team..luckily specialist yg tgk was my neighbour sebelah rumah hehe.dok dalam ward 1 night bosannnnnyerrrrr.dah la eventful coz the lady beside me just delivered and jatuh 2 kali dlm ward so asyik terdengar jeritan..doctor,tolong!!!..tula dah namenye keje dr nih masuk ward pon kene treat patient..in conclusion..i dapat MC 2 weeks which is really near to my due date..so i mencutikan diri terus sampai deliver nyeh nyeh
like magic my swollen legs shrink after i came back from ward..last week i felt like i was already going into labour so we hastily packed everything and came back to KL.
today is my 39th week.and munchkin showed no signs of coming out yet.it seems like she's getting more and more comfortable in there.i dont wanna go post date..but everybody else sibuk nak samekan birthday die ngan diorg..waduh2 mummy tak larat nak tunggu dah..now rase mcm over rested plak.papepon i just pray that everything will go smoothly and both me and baby selamat.
maybe next time the blog will have photos.menarik sket kan..
Sunday, January 03, 2010
selamat tahun baru 2010
...suatu ketika dulu pada 10 november 2004...aku memaparkan penulisan aku yang pertama dalam blog AKU DAN SESUATU ini yang sekarang ini diubah menjadi blog KAMI DAN SESUATU..seiring dengan status aku yang sudah dimiliki..hehehe...dan sekarang adalah penulisan aku yang pertama pada tahun 2010..iaitu telah hampir 6 tahun aku melibatkan diri dalam bidang penulisan di alam maya ini...terima kasih buat sahabat aku encik kelambu@ azhan uthmani atas semangat yang diberi dalam merealisasikan blog aku yang telah berumur 6 tahun in....
sepanjang aku berblog ini...disinilah tempat aku meluahkan perasaan..mencoret apa sahaja yang terlintas dihati...aku tidak pernah merancang dalam setiap penulisan...cuma..buka komputer..dan terus taip...
.....Alhamdulilah...umur aku dipanjangkan Allah untuk terus bernafas didunia ini...Alhamdulilah dengan kebahagiaan yang aku terima sekarang...sesungguhnya aku amat bersyukur dengan rahmatmu ya Allah..benarlah pesan Nabi...isteri yang solehah adalah harta yang paling bermakna dalam dunia ini...dan sekarang ini aku merasakannya...kehidupan ini menjadi terlalu indah buatku...dia mengubah malamku menjadi malam paling indah..dia mengubah siangku menjadi siang yang paling bercahaya dan dia sentiasa mengubah sedihku menjadi ketawaku dan dia jugalah yang mengubah takutku menjadi kekuatanku....aku cinta padamu isteriku...
.....hmmm...yang paling hebat akan berlaku dalam hidupku pada tahun 2010 ini ialah kami akan menerima ahli baru dalam keluarga Hazman...kehadiran zuriatku yang merupakan cahaya mata pengikat kasih sayang kami...sesungguhnya tiada kata atau ungkapan yang dapat menggambarkan betapa hebatnya perasaan ini....muga semuanya selamat..amin
.....selamat tahun baru 2010...muga tahun ini menjanjikan kebahagiaan yang lebih bermakna buat semuanya...
sepanjang aku berblog ini...disinilah tempat aku meluahkan perasaan..mencoret apa sahaja yang terlintas dihati...aku tidak pernah merancang dalam setiap penulisan...cuma..buka komputer..dan terus taip...
.....Alhamdulilah...umur aku dipanjangkan Allah untuk terus bernafas didunia ini...Alhamdulilah dengan kebahagiaan yang aku terima sekarang...sesungguhnya aku amat bersyukur dengan rahmatmu ya Allah..benarlah pesan Nabi...isteri yang solehah adalah harta yang paling bermakna dalam dunia ini...dan sekarang ini aku merasakannya...kehidupan ini menjadi terlalu indah buatku...dia mengubah malamku menjadi malam paling indah..dia mengubah siangku menjadi siang yang paling bercahaya dan dia sentiasa mengubah sedihku menjadi ketawaku dan dia jugalah yang mengubah takutku menjadi kekuatanku....aku cinta padamu isteriku...
.....hmmm...yang paling hebat akan berlaku dalam hidupku pada tahun 2010 ini ialah kami akan menerima ahli baru dalam keluarga Hazman...kehadiran zuriatku yang merupakan cahaya mata pengikat kasih sayang kami...sesungguhnya tiada kata atau ungkapan yang dapat menggambarkan betapa hebatnya perasaan ini....muga semuanya selamat..amin
.....selamat tahun baru 2010...muga tahun ini menjanjikan kebahagiaan yang lebih bermakna buat semuanya...
Thursday, December 24, 2009
dari alor setar ke JB
last weekend we made the almost impossible journey from utara to selatan after much debates and nagging from mama n hubby.thank god i was not having severe cramps.i told myself and every muscles in my body..please be strong to tahan the long journey.please please please allow me to go and see my luvly friend shaz on her wedding day..i swear in this world there are only 2 weddings compulsory for me to attend,its a sin if i didnt go.hers is one of them.alhamdullilah..i got to see her as non double chin no spare tyre glamorous fabulous ratu sehari.i am so happy for her..god knows when is the next time we'll be meeting each other again.tapi mmg puas hati eden
after balik rase kesian sgt tgk my hero..hubby huhu.he looked so tired having to drive all the way.massaging me,entertaining my antics,taking care of me every steps of the way.he just smiled and smiled..i heart you B.thank you so much for doing this for me.it means the world to me.sayang janji nanti sayang bagi upah best heheh
we got to do detail scan for munchkin also.munchkin looks so healthy and happy.she already has a good weight..2.5kg.which is bigger than me when i was born.way to go anak mummy!
hmm now im just waiting to do my last call.tak sabar nak abiskan so that i can focus on preparing for munchkin.i think most of her things are ready but my things are far from packed.i pray that she doesnt choose to pop out too early hehe
after balik rase kesian sgt tgk my hero..hubby huhu.he looked so tired having to drive all the way.massaging me,entertaining my antics,taking care of me every steps of the way.he just smiled and smiled..i heart you B.thank you so much for doing this for me.it means the world to me.sayang janji nanti sayang bagi upah best heheh
we got to do detail scan for munchkin also.munchkin looks so healthy and happy.she already has a good weight..2.5kg.which is bigger than me when i was born.way to go anak mummy!
hmm now im just waiting to do my last call.tak sabar nak abiskan so that i can focus on preparing for munchkin.i think most of her things are ready but my things are far from packed.i pray that she doesnt choose to pop out too early hehe
Monday, December 07, 2009
what i wanna do
but i cant..yet!
laser eye treatment..bile glasses ade masalah n mata menjadi rabun..and my colleague said she cud drive to the hospital for check up only after 1 day post treatment..
rase nak oncall back to back to make the money for the cost..it costs a fortune!!
(untuk org mcm saye laaa huhu)
not to terasa when some people say/do sth..but i still do..well we are human beings..nak buat camne..buat bodo je laa
agar tiada perang dunia tercetus semula
tak penat lepas oncall and ceria untuk berjalan/beraktiviti ke mana2 bile hubby/family ajak saye..susah woooo
sangat susah..try laaa oncall..try sendiri
lagi tak try kompem tak paham
sorg staff nurse saye yg dah keje berpuluh tahun kat sepital tuh smalam tanye camne oncall ni sebenanye..cite la kat die..so die tanye saye..apsal laa dr nak jadi dr??saye cakap..dah termaktub dlm idop saye agaknye
see !org yg keje ngan kitorg pon tak paham..ape lagi org yang penah masuk sepital untuk melawat sahaja..i wont waste my time to make u guys understand..
risau nih takut ade anak kang ngantuk mase jage die lepas oncall..tapi colleagues saye ok je..shud be ok kot..
its all about willpower!!
nak masuk sehati berdansa..best tgk org dancing ngan spouse ni..sangat suweeeeetttt..
laser eye treatment..bile glasses ade masalah n mata menjadi rabun..and my colleague said she cud drive to the hospital for check up only after 1 day post treatment..
rase nak oncall back to back to make the money for the cost..it costs a fortune!!
(untuk org mcm saye laaa huhu)
not to terasa when some people say/do sth..but i still do..well we are human beings..nak buat camne..buat bodo je laa
agar tiada perang dunia tercetus semula
tak penat lepas oncall and ceria untuk berjalan/beraktiviti ke mana2 bile hubby/family ajak saye..susah woooo
sangat susah..try laaa oncall..try sendiri
lagi tak try kompem tak paham
sorg staff nurse saye yg dah keje berpuluh tahun kat sepital tuh smalam tanye camne oncall ni sebenanye..cite la kat die..so die tanye saye..apsal laa dr nak jadi dr??saye cakap..dah termaktub dlm idop saye agaknye
see !org yg keje ngan kitorg pon tak paham..ape lagi org yang penah masuk sepital untuk melawat sahaja..i wont waste my time to make u guys understand..
risau nih takut ade anak kang ngantuk mase jage die lepas oncall..tapi colleagues saye ok je..shud be ok kot..
its all about willpower!!
nak masuk sehati berdansa..best tgk org dancing ngan spouse ni..sangat suweeeeetttt..
Wednesday, December 02, 2009
fear
we are at the 8th month..
work is still as bz as ever..had a dragging meeting today..the conclusion is a new motto for our department..WORK LESS AND GET PROMOTED!its a long story..
btw..im just feel like writing bout my random thoughts
am afraid of a lot of things lately
been asking around for a nanny..many are interested..my heart just didnt have enough trust to leave my lil baby with anyone except hubby..unfortunately he obviously wont make to the list of possible nanny..except maybe during the weekend
bibik?bottom most in the list..dont want my baby to speak with a weird accent plus i am not comfortable having a stranger in the house
second..fear of having to go through a caesarean..at 32 weeks,baby is still breech..aka upside down with its legs nicely tucked in front of its belly which makes vaginal birth impossible.im praying everyday that it'll turn while doing its sommersault..c-section comes with a lot of complications hence i would do anything to avoid it
third..fear of not being good enough a parent..well if u look at my diet during my pregnancy..u'll understand what i mean.while other mothers are bz storing as much nutrients as possible for their babies..i just eat anything i could grab..while they are researching for ways to teach their babies calculus from an early stage..i just slept on my non call nights..or maybe tried to bloghop and learn something..rarely..
and the list goes on and on..
cant even take good care of hubby..how am i going to take care of a small baby all alone..
i have to take a deep breath and relax...in and out..in and out..phewwww
on a different note
i HEART fresh orange..cant get enough of em..slurp!if bole dapat segelas now heavennyerrrrrr
work is still as bz as ever..had a dragging meeting today..the conclusion is a new motto for our department..WORK LESS AND GET PROMOTED!its a long story..
btw..im just feel like writing bout my random thoughts
am afraid of a lot of things lately
been asking around for a nanny..many are interested..my heart just didnt have enough trust to leave my lil baby with anyone except hubby..unfortunately he obviously wont make to the list of possible nanny..except maybe during the weekend
bibik?bottom most in the list..dont want my baby to speak with a weird accent plus i am not comfortable having a stranger in the house
second..fear of having to go through a caesarean..at 32 weeks,baby is still breech..aka upside down with its legs nicely tucked in front of its belly which makes vaginal birth impossible.im praying everyday that it'll turn while doing its sommersault..c-section comes with a lot of complications hence i would do anything to avoid it
third..fear of not being good enough a parent..well if u look at my diet during my pregnancy..u'll understand what i mean.while other mothers are bz storing as much nutrients as possible for their babies..i just eat anything i could grab..while they are researching for ways to teach their babies calculus from an early stage..i just slept on my non call nights..or maybe tried to bloghop and learn something..rarely..
and the list goes on and on..
cant even take good care of hubby..how am i going to take care of a small baby all alone..
i have to take a deep breath and relax...in and out..in and out..phewwww
on a different note
i HEART fresh orange..cant get enough of em..slurp!if bole dapat segelas now heavennyerrrrrr
Saturday, November 21, 2009
1st anniversary
...rasanya baru semalam aku melafazkan penerimaan nikah isteri tersayang dihadapan Allah dan bersaksikan imam masjid wilayah persekutuan dan seluruh hadirin lain...sesunguhnya masa berganjak sekelip mata...rasanya pagi ini sungguh hebat...macam semalam merupakan malam pertama...hehehe...dada ini masih kuat berdebar pada kali pertama melihat aurat isteri tercinta..hahaha...aku tak akan lupakan saat terkakunya aku pada kali pertama melihat isteriku lengkap berpakaian..tapi tanpa tudung..setiap helai rambutnya bersinar....huhhh...hehehe...
hmm..esok genaplah setahun pernikahan kami...tapi tak terasa langsung masa setahun tu...setiap saat berlalu dengan gelak tawa dan air mata kebahagiaan....begitu hebat rasa ini...sesungguhnya..aku sujud padaMU ya Allah dengan penuh rasa syukur dengan jodoh dan kebahagiaan ini...
....sekarang aku menanti isteri tercinta pulang...dia ada scoop(scoop ni adalah proses masukkan kamera/teropong kechik dalam anggota badan nak cari penyakit...ni wife aku lah kata...)...tapi tengahari ni kami akan ke penang...honeymoon..stay kat hotel Golden sand resort shang ri la...batu feringgi...best giler tido kat hotel pada malam pertama anniversary...hahaha..malam ni plak ada special dinner...esok plak ada photoshot kat studio..kami nak bergambar kat studio...aku dah lama plan nak bergambar ngan wifey kat studio...tak sabar nak bergambar ngan wanita cun melecun yang sedang mengandung...hehehe
......
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO MY WONDERFUL WIFE....
I'M REALLY LUCKY TO HAVE A WIFE AS WONDERFUL AS YOU....
I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART, AND I ALWAYS WILL...
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY...............
hmm..esok genaplah setahun pernikahan kami...tapi tak terasa langsung masa setahun tu...setiap saat berlalu dengan gelak tawa dan air mata kebahagiaan....begitu hebat rasa ini...sesungguhnya..aku sujud padaMU ya Allah dengan penuh rasa syukur dengan jodoh dan kebahagiaan ini...
....sekarang aku menanti isteri tercinta pulang...dia ada scoop(scoop ni adalah proses masukkan kamera/teropong kechik dalam anggota badan nak cari penyakit...ni wife aku lah kata...)...tapi tengahari ni kami akan ke penang...honeymoon..stay kat hotel Golden sand resort shang ri la...batu feringgi...best giler tido kat hotel pada malam pertama anniversary...hahaha..malam ni plak ada special dinner...esok plak ada photoshot kat studio..kami nak bergambar kat studio...aku dah lama plan nak bergambar ngan wifey kat studio...tak sabar nak bergambar ngan wanita cun melecun yang sedang mengandung...hehehe
......
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO MY WONDERFUL WIFE....
I'M REALLY LUCKY TO HAVE A WIFE AS WONDERFUL AS YOU....
I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART, AND I ALWAYS WILL...
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY...............
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
countdown
yoohooooo
update from the north..
today for no reason asyik penat je..pegi keje pon lambat
and baby munchkin gave a me a scare of my life..it didnt move the whole day..i was in the OT thinking if baby is ok..usually during calls it wud be me who didnt realise its movement coz i'll be so absorbed in work..but in OT we'll be quite static..and nada!not a single kick!3 pm i went down to Obs clinic and had a scan..it looked fine enuff..legaaaa mummy..
so where should i start..we are a day shy of 7 month,munchkin is 1.1 kg to be precised now.usually very active..still no pattern of activity and sleep yet.sometimes it'll be awake at 3 am in the morning,kicking while im having my leg cramps.so sweet temankan eden mase eden tgh sakit.im so happy nowadays..ade teman pegi mane2..bile makan pon tak la makan sorg dgn muke toye dah..ade little baby making sommersaults in my womb..approved of the food choice hehe
we've had our detail scan..and the most prominent features munchkin has is a sharp chin..which neither me nor hubby has.we decided it will look like tok kedah.more so in my side of the family,all first borns will usually look like their paternal grandma..hence the conclusion.i should have taken hubby's photo after the scan..he looked so angau as if he was walking on cloud 9..i was almost jealous of the baby *grin*.we were just in time to see it in action..it was sucking its thumb..then gulp down the amniotic fluid..crossed its long legs..mummy really wants it to have papa's height and long lashes.papepon asalkan munchkin sihat..mummy sebenanye tak kisah.
we already have a name for munchkin..almost finalised.it has both our names in it hehe.i have a new craze now.shopping for baby stuffs..seronot!! dah lame tak rase seronot shopping macam now..we didnt buy expensive cloths coz baby will grow up fast.but we did invested a bit for gadgets..bole pass to our coming babies insyaAllah =D.kesian hubby laaa..since i rarely have time..i heret him around KL in 3 days trying to get everything.everyday he pengsan right after we reached home.kat SP..i online window shopping from my couch..every single day..sgt best hihi
im doing my final countdown..we are reaching our BIG Day in a few weeks time.looking back..it was the best year of my life..and i know that many more are coming our way
i could never thank the Almighty enough for hubby
He has made me blissfully happy every second that passed
i thank Allah that hubby sees beauty in my flaws
thank Him that hubby is amused by my silliness and weakness
I am full of gratitudes for every gestures and comfort he gave me
i cherished every laugh and tear we shared together
i pray that hubby is happy
there are so many things i havent done for him
i am yet to bake his favourite moist choc cake
i am yet to master the best way to goreng koay teow
but i hope he'll give me a lifetime due date to do everything for him
and i swear i will try my very best..
i am not good with words as he is..but i hope he can feel the love in the air everytime he thinks of me
cant wait to see hubby talks to munchkin this weekend..its the most beautiful picture i've captured in my heart
update from the north..
today for no reason asyik penat je..pegi keje pon lambat
and baby munchkin gave a me a scare of my life..it didnt move the whole day..i was in the OT thinking if baby is ok..usually during calls it wud be me who didnt realise its movement coz i'll be so absorbed in work..but in OT we'll be quite static..and nada!not a single kick!3 pm i went down to Obs clinic and had a scan..it looked fine enuff..legaaaa mummy..
so where should i start..we are a day shy of 7 month,munchkin is 1.1 kg to be precised now.usually very active..still no pattern of activity and sleep yet.sometimes it'll be awake at 3 am in the morning,kicking while im having my leg cramps.so sweet temankan eden mase eden tgh sakit.im so happy nowadays..ade teman pegi mane2..bile makan pon tak la makan sorg dgn muke toye dah..ade little baby making sommersaults in my womb..approved of the food choice hehe
we've had our detail scan..and the most prominent features munchkin has is a sharp chin..which neither me nor hubby has.we decided it will look like tok kedah.more so in my side of the family,all first borns will usually look like their paternal grandma..hence the conclusion.i should have taken hubby's photo after the scan..he looked so angau as if he was walking on cloud 9..i was almost jealous of the baby *grin*.we were just in time to see it in action..it was sucking its thumb..then gulp down the amniotic fluid..crossed its long legs..mummy really wants it to have papa's height and long lashes.papepon asalkan munchkin sihat..mummy sebenanye tak kisah.
we already have a name for munchkin..almost finalised.it has both our names in it hehe.i have a new craze now.shopping for baby stuffs..seronot!! dah lame tak rase seronot shopping macam now..we didnt buy expensive cloths coz baby will grow up fast.but we did invested a bit for gadgets..bole pass to our coming babies insyaAllah =D.kesian hubby laaa..since i rarely have time..i heret him around KL in 3 days trying to get everything.everyday he pengsan right after we reached home.kat SP..i online window shopping from my couch..every single day..sgt best hihi
im doing my final countdown..we are reaching our BIG Day in a few weeks time.looking back..it was the best year of my life..and i know that many more are coming our way
i could never thank the Almighty enough for hubby
He has made me blissfully happy every second that passed
i thank Allah that hubby sees beauty in my flaws
thank Him that hubby is amused by my silliness and weakness
I am full of gratitudes for every gestures and comfort he gave me
i cherished every laugh and tear we shared together
i pray that hubby is happy
there are so many things i havent done for him
i am yet to bake his favourite moist choc cake
i am yet to master the best way to goreng koay teow
but i hope he'll give me a lifetime due date to do everything for him
and i swear i will try my very best..
i am not good with words as he is..but i hope he can feel the love in the air everytime he thinks of me
cant wait to see hubby talks to munchkin this weekend..its the most beautiful picture i've captured in my heart
Sunday, October 25, 2009
kami mengandung
"KAMI mengandung,dah nak masuk 7bulan"...itulah yang aku akan jawab,setiap kali pertanyaan tentang isteriku...aku akan menggunakan kata ganti diri 'kami' untuk menunjukkan bahawa..pemengandungan tersebut adalah kerna hasil usaha dan kerja keras kami berdua secara kerjasama dan kordinasi yang hebat...hehehe..
...kadang kala kami berdua akan berdiri depan cermin untuk saling membandingkan perut siapa yang lebih maju kedepan...aku cuma dapat mendahului pada 3bulan pertama kandungan isteriku...sekarang dia jauh mengatasi aku...hehe..tetapi sekarang aku nak undur kebelakang kembali perutku ini...walaupun kajian telah membuktikan bahawa boroi itu salah satu tanda kebahagiaan....tapi aku tak rela...hehehe
Alhamdulilah..kami dalam fasa terakhir persediaan untuk menerima kehadiran ahli baru dalam keluarga kami ini...segala kelengkapan baby telah hampir sempurna...bak kata isteri ku..kalau terbesalin sekarang..dah adalah kelengkapan baby nak dibawa...hmmm...bila disebut tentang kelengkapan baby sekarang ni..memang jauh berubah dari zaman aku dulu....sekarang barang baby memang canggih sungguh...tilam baby sekarang pun dah ada yang anti macam2...anti kuman lah..anti hamalah..anti lemas lah...memang canggihlah...botol susu plak..siap ada sterilzer lagi nak matikan kuman...memang kena study dan pandai pilihlah brand yang sesuai dan terbaik...aku plak dah macam ibu2 plak...pantang pi shopping complex..memang habis lah kedai baby aku singgah...tapi memang satu kepuasan dan keseronokkan bila membeli belah barang baby ni bersama isteri tercinta...walaupun satu kuala lumpur aku redah...memang tak rasa letih langsung...tapi bila balik tidur..sure tido mati punya...heheeh...
so sekarang ni aku rasa aku dah layak untuk menjadi penasihat barang2 baby ni...dari botol susu sampai ke sikat baby aku dah boleh bagi nasihat dah buat kawan2 yg terkial-kial mencari maklumat lagi...hehehe....
....sebagai seorang lelaki yang bakal menjadi ayah kepada anak aku sendiri...memang merasa sangat gembira..sukar untuk dilafazkan dengan sebarang kata atau apa sahaja...hanya tangan dapat menadah kelangit dan bersujud kepada Allah betapa bersyukurnya aku dikurniakan rezeki permata hati ini...dan yang paling membahagiakan aku ialah...anak aku mempunyai seorang ibu yang sangat hebat...wanita paling sempurna dalam hidupku...wanita yang paling layak untuk menjadi ibu kepada zuriatku...dan aku telah menunaikan tanggungjawab pertama buat anakku..iaitu memberikan seorang ibu yang terhebat buat permata hatiku ini...
...kadang kala kami berdua akan berdiri depan cermin untuk saling membandingkan perut siapa yang lebih maju kedepan...aku cuma dapat mendahului pada 3bulan pertama kandungan isteriku...sekarang dia jauh mengatasi aku...hehe..tetapi sekarang aku nak undur kebelakang kembali perutku ini...walaupun kajian telah membuktikan bahawa boroi itu salah satu tanda kebahagiaan....tapi aku tak rela...hehehe
Alhamdulilah..kami dalam fasa terakhir persediaan untuk menerima kehadiran ahli baru dalam keluarga kami ini...segala kelengkapan baby telah hampir sempurna...bak kata isteri ku..kalau terbesalin sekarang..dah adalah kelengkapan baby nak dibawa...hmmm...bila disebut tentang kelengkapan baby sekarang ni..memang jauh berubah dari zaman aku dulu....sekarang barang baby memang canggih sungguh...tilam baby sekarang pun dah ada yang anti macam2...anti kuman lah..anti hamalah..anti lemas lah...memang canggihlah...botol susu plak..siap ada sterilzer lagi nak matikan kuman...memang kena study dan pandai pilihlah brand yang sesuai dan terbaik...aku plak dah macam ibu2 plak...pantang pi shopping complex..memang habis lah kedai baby aku singgah...tapi memang satu kepuasan dan keseronokkan bila membeli belah barang baby ni bersama isteri tercinta...walaupun satu kuala lumpur aku redah...memang tak rasa letih langsung...tapi bila balik tidur..sure tido mati punya...heheeh...
so sekarang ni aku rasa aku dah layak untuk menjadi penasihat barang2 baby ni...dari botol susu sampai ke sikat baby aku dah boleh bagi nasihat dah buat kawan2 yg terkial-kial mencari maklumat lagi...hehehe....
....sebagai seorang lelaki yang bakal menjadi ayah kepada anak aku sendiri...memang merasa sangat gembira..sukar untuk dilafazkan dengan sebarang kata atau apa sahaja...hanya tangan dapat menadah kelangit dan bersujud kepada Allah betapa bersyukurnya aku dikurniakan rezeki permata hati ini...dan yang paling membahagiakan aku ialah...anak aku mempunyai seorang ibu yang sangat hebat...wanita paling sempurna dalam hidupku...wanita yang paling layak untuk menjadi ibu kepada zuriatku...dan aku telah menunaikan tanggungjawab pertama buat anakku..iaitu memberikan seorang ibu yang terhebat buat permata hatiku ini...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)